It's In My Nature to Hate You
Today I finally discussed with JJ the matter of my burning inner hatred towards ... well, everyone. And my stress and anxiety and depression. It seems to me that so many people just don't understand it. It is to them, what to me is alcoholism - incomprehensible. I just don't understand it, yet it exists in so many people. My depressions and anxieties are similar - more oft than not, there is no legitimate reason for them to weigh down on me so greatly, but they do. It's simply in my nature to be stressed out and angry.
On a different subject, my hands have been destroyed by the soaps and sanitizers at the bar. My flesh is cracked and peeling and it's unbelievably uncomfortable. Just another thing that makes me hate my job. I'm tired of spending countless hours making drinks and running food - my passion for creativity and writing and visual stimulation are not being fed, nor are my desires being fulfilled. I want to leave and get another job - even a shittier paying job at a place I might enjoy more.
On a related note, I found out today that I am not going to be getting the job with Sony Pictures' new development office because I had to leave my internship at Sony Classics earlier than anticipated. Yes, once again, my personal finances and choices relating so said finances have fucked me over; I either never have the money to do the things I want to do, or I spend my time worrying about how I'm going to get money to do the things I need to do, or I make choices thinking they're in my best fiscal interests and wind up finding out that to others those choices are a symbol of misplaced priorities. Apparently, I was supposed to not be able to make my housing payments so that I could stay on at SPC. That was apparently the correct path to a job I would actually want to have.
At any rate, it's Sony's loss really. Sharon (Badal, my professor in Producing Essentials, and probably the best teacher I've ever had at the college level - also, she's simply brilliant) said that one of the things she feels helped her in her time at Orion Pictures was her "eye for good films." She could spot a script or a potential acquisition that was just "it." "The one." I think I've got the same gift and I would love to do coverage for a major studio. I think I could bring a lot to the fold. But, like I said, it's Sony's loss, really.
I suppose that I should look for a new job in the next few weeks. However, PRIORITY ONE right now is Completing the Script for "Obscene Question." I need to have a completed new draft by class next Friday. With my entire weekend taken up by work, though, it'll be difficult. I'm notorious for finding some way of distracting myself from doing the things I really need to get done.
"Victory shall be mine!" - Stewie
On a different subject, my hands have been destroyed by the soaps and sanitizers at the bar. My flesh is cracked and peeling and it's unbelievably uncomfortable. Just another thing that makes me hate my job. I'm tired of spending countless hours making drinks and running food - my passion for creativity and writing and visual stimulation are not being fed, nor are my desires being fulfilled. I want to leave and get another job - even a shittier paying job at a place I might enjoy more.
On a related note, I found out today that I am not going to be getting the job with Sony Pictures' new development office because I had to leave my internship at Sony Classics earlier than anticipated. Yes, once again, my personal finances and choices relating so said finances have fucked me over; I either never have the money to do the things I want to do, or I spend my time worrying about how I'm going to get money to do the things I need to do, or I make choices thinking they're in my best fiscal interests and wind up finding out that to others those choices are a symbol of misplaced priorities. Apparently, I was supposed to not be able to make my housing payments so that I could stay on at SPC. That was apparently the correct path to a job I would actually want to have.
At any rate, it's Sony's loss really. Sharon (Badal, my professor in Producing Essentials, and probably the best teacher I've ever had at the college level - also, she's simply brilliant) said that one of the things she feels helped her in her time at Orion Pictures was her "eye for good films." She could spot a script or a potential acquisition that was just "it." "The one." I think I've got the same gift and I would love to do coverage for a major studio. I think I could bring a lot to the fold. But, like I said, it's Sony's loss, really.
I suppose that I should look for a new job in the next few weeks. However, PRIORITY ONE right now is Completing the Script for "Obscene Question." I need to have a completed new draft by class next Friday. With my entire weekend taken up by work, though, it'll be difficult. I'm notorious for finding some way of distracting myself from doing the things I really need to get done.
"Victory shall be mine!" - Stewie
posted by Dave at 1:54:00 AM
4 Comments:
PS - I'm thinking about shaving my head bald. If Michael Rosenbaum can look that good as Lex Luthor in Smallville, I can make bald work for me.
PLEASE..... Don't shave your head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's in my nature to beat you with wet noodles until you fall over in exhaustion from annoyance, I'm fighting it just fine I think you can like people more...-Dan
dont shave your head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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