The Illusion of Movement

I need to pre-face my entry tonight with a revelation. I am somewhere in between completely comfortable and unbelievably uncomfortable with posting my thoughts in this space. Initially, as I've mentioned before, I meant to utilize this forum as a diary of sorts; a means of keeping track of things for myself. However, it would be foolish of me to delude myself into believing that this type of medium is meant for the private eyes of one person - it's the world wide web and anyone can Google my latest update. What makes me uncomfortable is that, despite the fact that I enjoy keeping my friends and family abreast of my life here in NY, this blog has no underlying cohesive thread. It isn't merely a forum for political debate, a single-minded chronology of my progress as a filmmaker, nor is it a place for me to leave chapters of fiction from an ongoing story I've conceived. It's simply a place I go to from time-to-time to share myself with the world - sometimes to send a message home, sometimes to disclose a revelation I've had (about myself, or the world, or both). This observation, that Tales from Narabin is, unlike the fictional world of its namesake, not of significant cohesive substance, upsets me. I would like to give people a reason to come back here - not simply to read the random musings of a young adult, inexperienced at life in the "real world," whatever that may be.

So, as far as the next few months are concerned, this site will contain one thought: my film.

Finally, having broken free of the heavy chains linking me to a story that was sinking slowly to the bottom of the sea, I have conceived of a new idea for my senior thesis film. It is a story about how we deal with the discovery of abuse existing nearby, even if we hadn't imagined that it could. Specifically, my short film will detail the experience of a young couple, incapable of conceiving a child, taking into their home an abused neighbor - and the creation of a surrogate family between them.

I have primary funds in place for the film, though I will need to secure more money for completion of the film, including print costs and promotion, including film festival entry fees. I have three producers onboard, all with minimal experience at producing. They all seem enthusiastic at the prospect of working on my film - as a matter of fact, there hasn't been a single person I've received feedback from who has read my script and not loved it. I hope that is a good sign.

I have one of, if not the single best DPs working with me on my film. He and I have discussed reference films; overall tones and themes; the look of the film. The stuff I guess every filmmaker talks about with his DP. The only difference is that this is really the first time for me ... I've never done any of this before. Regardless of whether my confidence is illusory or I truly am completely secure in my abilities, I feel that my drive to succeed in translating the fantastic story on those pages onto celluloid will lead us to an equally fantastic end product.

Tomorrow is an important day. I'm meeting with the person who makes or breaks special rig requests for students. I'm going to try to pursuade him that my film merits use of the school's Panavision rig. Without going into detail about how fantastic 35mm images are and how I only want to use film and not digital for this and blah blah blah, I simply have to state: I need that rig. Getting that equipment would be a major step towards reducing the costs of shooting, allowing me to reallocate funds from camera rentals into other needs. I need to give the best pitch I've ever given - and I haven't had much practice.

Details of that meeting to follow ...