Sexually Tilted Star Wars

For those Star Wars fans who have always thought there was something almost perverse to some of the dialogue in the original trilogy. These are like 10 years old or older, so you may have seen them before; if not, I present to you, Sexually Tilted Star Wars:

Top 10 Sexually Tilted Lines from
Star Wars IV: A New Hope:

1. "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."
   
2. "Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!"
   
3. "Look at the size of that thing!"
   
4. "Sorry about the mess..."
   
5. "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
   
6. "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?"
   
7. "You've got something jammed in here real good."
   
8. "Put that thing away before you get us all killed!"
   
9. "Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"
   
10. "Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!"
    
    
    

Top 10 Sexually Tilted Lines from
Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back:

1. "And I thought they smelled bad...on the outside!"
   
2. "Possible he came in through the south entrance."
   
3. "I must've hit her pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh, kid?"
   
4. "Hurry up, golden rod..."
   
5. "That's okay, I'd like to keep it on manual control for awhile."
   
6. "But now we must eat. Come, good food, come..."
   
7. "Control, control! You must learn control!"
   
8. "There's an awful lot of moisture in here."
   
9. "Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?"
   
10. "I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me!"
    
    
    

Top 10 Sexually Tilted Lines from
Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi:

1. "Rise, my friend."
   
2. "Open the back door!"
   
3. "Hey, point that thing somewhere else!"
   
4. "It's just a dead animal..."
   
5. "Not bad for a little furball."
   
6. "How can they be jamming us if they don't know we're coming?"
   
7. "Come here, I won't hurt you. You want something to eat?"
   
8. "Keep on that one, I'll take these two."
   
9. "I want you to take her. I mean it, take her!"
   
10. "I don't think the Empire had wookies in mind they designed her, Chewie."

Off-Topic

On a side note, I wanted to lend my online voice in support of casting Vincent Cassel as The Joker in the sequel to Batman Begins. The guy was awesome in Ocean's Twelve, and has the physicality, screen presence and face to pull off the role. The man can act the part.

His IMDb bio. And, for kicks, an image from another of his films photoshopped to look like the Joker.

My Lack of Updatingness

As per Dan's request, I'm posting an update.

I generally bitch here. I'm not going to do that.

Putting together a production is difficult. It has been suggested to me that I get a producer. Unfortunately, despite having taken several producing classes, I don't know a single person I would want to produce my film. I e-mailed one person who was the first person on my list, who promptly replied in the resoundingly negative. Three sentences, very professional, and yet also very much so "no."

My list is down to me. That person, and me. I have seen good producers, I have seen bad producers. This can't be a bad production. I can neither afford it financially, or endure it psychologically. With the subject matter I have chosen, the entire production must be handled with delicate hands ... hands that I believe only I may have.

So I am not bringing anyone onboard as a producer until the actual production, at which point I will need a line producer or a production manager to handle things on-set.

I'm playing my pre-game music and working out my nerves - I'm preparing for the coming battle: Me vs. Everything Else.

If you don't hear from me, assume I'm either dead or really busy.